The Pattern Room

When I was fairly young, I think about 11, I remember going to Fiona to learn about shadow and about the Pattern. From things I overheard some of my Uncles say at various times I was intensely curious. Fi was cautions, but informative, and to this day I believe she answered my questions pretty honestly. We always did get along well.

Finally, after a long discussion, I asked her to show it to me. She suspected, quite correctly, that I intended to try to walk it, but she didn’t betray me. Knowing how I felt towards my father, she diplomatically sent a servant to inform Grandfather ‘where we were going’. I grinned at her, she knew me too well. I wonder how things may have gone if she’d just trumped him, but that’s under the bridge now.

I can only surmise that my father somehow overheard or intercepted the servant’s message; I doubt Grandfather informed him. We were only just arriving at the great door when Grandfather appeared. He looked at me appraisingly, but offered no comment. Not a big surprise, he was rarely garrulous with me.

We entered the room, and as I stood in awe gazing at the Pattern glowing before me, Fi gave me her instructions and advice, glancing occasionally at Grandfather. I listened carefully, getting ready while staring down at the first terrifying step.

Suddenly, the door was heavily swung open, and I turned to see Father enter with Uncle Julian in tow. Fi must have seen me tense, eyes narrowing, as she stepped over to me and rested a hand lightly on my shoulder.

Father gestured flamboyantly, "And I almost missed the fun!" He turned to Julian with a gloating expression, "Get ready to pay up brother, this time I will win."

Julian didn’t bother to reply, scowling faintly and crossing him arms over his chest. His eyes never left me.

I started at my father a long moment, hate seething through me. Fighting for control, I smiled to him with a voice sweet as sugar, "This would please you very much Father?"

Obviously, he had a learning curve. His eyes were wary as he turned to me, "It would be a good time to claim your heritage" he answered.

"Then" I said, satisfied, "I don’t want it."

Julian raised one measured eyebrow, and I caught Fi covering a smile. Grandfather just scowled. I turned on my heel, head high, and walked out. Behind me, I heard words sweeter than ambrosia from Grandfather’s gravelly voice.

"Bleys, you are three kinds of fool, and none of them good."

Smiling, I went back to my rooms. Father stayed out of my hair for a full three weeks, after his return from the survey of K’rin’s sailors that Grandfather sent him on, and I was immensely pleased with myself.